fools in love
by stars shine out
Summary: She's letting him go so she can love another. Why? Because she's been pretending for so long, that truthfully, she's a little lost at heart. **Sort of Remus/Lily, more James/Lily, formerly Lost at Heart. Edited.


**Prompt:**

_Pick as many or as few as you want:_

_triangles: PeterMarySirius, __**Remus/Lily/James**__, FabianMarleneGideon_

_prompts: __**blossom**__, copper, "I loved you first", __**geranium**_

_song: Skinny Love - Bon Iver_

**Author's Note: So, first I'd like to thank **_**what stars are**_** for the prompt. I had a lot of fun writing with it. I've been wanting to attempt writing a Remus/Lily for a while, and this gave me a good place to do so… YAAY! ;)**

**Disclaimer: all things Harry Potter belong to JK Rowling**

**EDIT: I've edited renamed this (it used to be called _Lost at Heart_) so hopefully it's less bad... ?**

**.**

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Remus held out a dainty geranium tentatively. Lily bit her lip. _Merlin, why did this have to be so hard?_ "When I saw it," Remus explained, "I thought it was so pretty, and, well, it reminded me of you. Because it was so pretty, like you." He added the end part as an afterthought.

"Erm... Thanks Remus." Said Lily awkwardly. He really wasn't helping her break up with him.

She saw James peeking out from around the corner behind Remus. _Hurry up!_ He mouthed to her. Lily glared at him.

Remus turned around, but not before James had hidden himself out of sight again. "What were you looking at Lily?" asked Remus, turning back to face her.

"Nothing." She told him quickly, "I just thought I saw something. Must have been the light."

Remus nodded eagerly. _God, why did he have to be so easy to fool?_ She wondered, _Why couldn't he see her losing interest? Why was he so naively blind?_

Remus reached out to her, pulled her into an embrace, and kissed her gently. _Oh Godric, she couldn't do it. _She pulled away. "What is it Lily?" asked Remus, searching her eyes.

"Remus, I…" Lily pulled herself out of his arms, searching for words. "I can't do this anymore."

Remus looked confused, but the confusion soon turned to something almost like anger. The geranium fell to the floor. "What can't you do anymore? Keep this secret? Date a werewolf? Date me?" he asked her, sounding a little desperate, "All of the above?" He turned away from her. "What Lily?" he was speaking loudly, crisply now. Almost like a bark.

"Remus…" said Lily softly. Remus spun back around. His light brown eyes were more golden than she'd ever seen them before. It was wild, dangerous, angry. "I can't love you like this, Remus." Lily said at last, "We aren't meant to love like this. I can't try, I can't pretend anymore. You're my best friend Remus, and I hope it stays that way, but that's all you can be!"

The anger faded from Remus's eyes, and was quickly replaced with growing sadness. "Lily…" he said softly, "Will you always feel this way, or are we an 'another time, another place' sort of couple?"

"I…" Lily bit her lip, then continued, "I don't know, Remus. If we ever get to that 'other time, other place', then I'll know but…" Lily trailed off. She saw a hint of hopefulness alight in the golden-brown eyes staring at her, and was immediately worried that she'd given the wrong impression. "But you can't wait for me, Remus." She told him, "I don't want you to. I want a happy ending for you. I want you to meet some ravishingly beautiful girl who adores you, and I want you to lover her. Her, not me. Marry her, have a family, have a happily ever after Remus, but don't wait for me."

"I suppose it'll take time, won't it?" said Remus eventually. "Getting over you, that is."

Lily nodded, and bit her lip. "You won't try and hang on, will you?"

"No." said Remus, "I like to think I'm too sensible for that. I'll probably eat chocolate, listen to depressing music, and drown myself in homework for the next couple weeks. I'll survive."

"Alright Remus." Said Lily, "And I'm sorry."

"Are you?" asked Remus.

"I…" Lily was a little shaken by Remus's comment. "I'm sorry I had to break your heart."

"…Fair enough." Said Remus, "I should go."

Lily bit her lip, and nodded as Remus turned and made his way back to the Gryffindor common room. Once Remus disappeared, James swept off his invisibility cloak, revealing himself standing a little ways down the hall. "Come, my Lily-flower," he said,a silly grin on his face, "Let us delve into the depths of the school, while the night is still young." He offered his arm gallantly.

Lily smiled weakly at him, bent down and picked up the geranium before taking James's arm. "He's my best friend, James." She said as way of explanation.

James kissed her cheek gently. "I know." He murmured to her. "He's my friend too. That's why we're keeping this a secret for a little while."

Lily sighed, and leaned into his shoulder. _One secret relationship to another_ she thought to herself. _At least this time, it's not permanently secret… Just till Remus gets over me… _Lily sighed, and she had to admit it still wouldn't be good when they went public… It would still hurt Remus, she knew, but it had to be done.

She and James strolled through the darkening halls. Maybe Lily had enjoyed her relationship with Remus more than she thought… but she had to admit that the relationship that was blossoming between her and James was really going to be something beautiful.


End file.
